Monday, February 28, 2011

#FinesseApproved Artist K'La

So, everyone knows that I was in the running to become Foxie 103's newest radio personality, correct? And we all know I got SNUBBED eliminated from that position, right? Yeah....That's neither here nor there....

ANYWHO during the said competition we were required to have some time on air with one of the personalities, Chillz. During my time in the studio, I heard a song who's beat reminded me of Bob Marley's "Turn Your Lights Down Low"...As I listened further I heard a female voice come on the track..."It's hard loving someone else...When you've barely got enough to love yourself......".
Just from the first sentence, I was hooked....I soon found out that the artist who sings and raps on this song is no other than the one and only Britanie "K'La" Buggs. I, being the curious individual that I am had to check her out on her mixtape "The Coldest Winter Ever"

An emcee, singer and songwriter all rapped up in one, I have yet to hear a track by K'La that hasn't impressed me! It's also refreshing to hear a female be so lyrical and not so much vulgar as REAL. Every one of her tracks content wise is something that ANYONE could relate to, and lyrically she paints a picture in such a way as I haven't heard in a while.

Here's K'La's song "All Your Love" off of her recent mixtape "Coldest Winter Ever". This is something you can just sit back and chill to, so ENJOY!

Keep an eye out for K'La!

#FinesseApproved Accessories

Searching through Necole Bitchie's website,, I ran across a SUPER cool new accessory....I will have these by this weekend....#lettheswaggerjackingbegin lol j/k...But forreal...remember I put you on! lol

Anywho...Here's the Video on how to do it!

Enjoy Looking Unique ;)

Sunday, February 27, 2011

B**** You IS My Girlfriend!!!! -#FinesseApprovedPhilosophies

I need everyone to close their eyes and picture the following scenario (or don't close your eyes...Because then you won't be able to read this....)

Females, you are in the club....You let a seemingly nice individual buy you drinks...
Fellas, you took a female to Waffle House after the club to get to know her better...

And NOW you are in a committed relationship (in their mind) because of it...It happens to the best of us....Oh, maybe it's just me.....

Laugh as you might, it happens on a lesser scale all the time! You are "talking" to someone (and by talking I mean dealing with someone really hard on a "relationship" level) and word gets back to you that you have a girlfriend....One that you didn't necessarily agree upon...

I'm sorry fellas...BUT.....If you are "talking" to someone and you can't tell them that you are sleeping with other people, and you can't tell THEM that you two are not exclusive....

B**** That IS your GF #kanyeshrug

The moral of the story is.....Watch your actions, because you MIGHT just be entering into a nonverbal contract.......And end up being someone's "significant other" without actually agreeing to it!

#FinesseApproved Fun..... the #LexPoint

Cheri Finesse Would Like To Introduce.....The #LexPoint

#LexPoint- (lĕks)\ˈpȯint\ v : The act of putting emphasis on certain words in a sentence by pointing in the manner of one, Lex A. Mayers. This manner includes using BOTH index fingers to point very strenuously while speaking to indicate the urgency or importance of various parts of a sentence.


Thursday, February 24, 2011

#FinesseApproved Philosophies on Love...... DATING/Courtship

Hello Sweeties!

It's been a LOOOOONG time since I have written, and I do apologize for that. Sometimes I just have these period when nothing inspires me to write (or nothing that I can openly speak on!)

*kat stacks voice* ANYWAY DOE, I had one of those days on FB when I just went ham on everything I thought about. You know how I do....I get one one subject, then max out my characters on one status so I write another one? Yeeeeah...

So I was thinking about how "Dating" or to be more specific, "Courtship" is a dying practice. (For those of you who are clueless as to the whole world of dating and courtship

Does anyone notice how even in music they went from



A lot of men don't ask me out on dates anymore honestly. Especially on FB, I get a lot of "Hey sexy...." and then they proceed to tell me how they would screw me... and I expect that being that I'm an eye candy model. But that doesn't mean I accept it. Even when I am fully clothed (in other words, just being my average, non sexual self) the best that men offer me at first is Waffle House or something janky like that. #Unacceptable. Men not only fail to try to impress women these days...but they throw a "bitchfit" if they have to pay! What is THAT about?

And I can't even blame it ALL on the men. Women, we have taken ourselves down off of that pedestal we once stood on. No, don't blame it on the strippers or video girls. Blame it on us woman as a whole. We do NOT have to accept a lot of the stuff that we do, but a lot of us are so scared to be alone (because our value is determined by whether or not we have a man) that we make little sacrifices here and there, but at WHAT expense? If we RAISE the bar, they have no choice but to reach up to come on our level. Don't make it easier than it has to be! Not saying we should "play games" just remember who you are and what you stand for, and NEVER compromise it. That makes things a lot easier. Hell, you can even start by refusing to go into a man's house. it's a tiny step, but think about the HUGE statement you are making by not making sex a possibility. There used to be a time when a young lady going over to a man's house unaccompanied was unheard of. While I think women should have say over what they do and do not do, I believe the PRINCIPLE behind it should be examined. When you refuse to go to his house or you refuse to invite him over, what message is that sending? To me it says "Sex isn't about to happen, not on your terms". You maintain control of the situation by maintaining control of the environment! Also, that cuts down on the confusion of having different men in and out of your house! lol

I often find myself having to set these men straight, both online and offline, and even then, the best date they can think of is "dinner and a movie".....There's no romance, no courtship and no chivalry.....Am I right, or am I wrong for NOT wanting to "buss it open" for a number 7 from Mickey D's and a dollar movie? What do y'all think?

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

A Letter 2 An Ex

Dearest Ex BF of mine,

I have been avoiding writing this for some time...Was it a fear of backlash from you? A fear of letting go? Maybe I didn't want to seem desperate...But recently, I have come to the conclusion that speaking about a difficult situation isn't desperate...Of anything, it's therapeutic...I need to reflect on what I have learned...and apply it! So.....

Let the healing begin....

My first mistake was allowing you to loosely claim me. I let you sell me that whole "No Title" thing from the beginning.You did everything from making me feel flattered by claiming and I quote: "I am trying to protect you from my crazy groupies" to making me feel guilty by saying "Why do we need a title, if I am doing everything I am supposed to, why put a name on it?" And it was cool at first because that meant that I was free to do my thing. But then you made it clear I was NOT to do my own thing. Yes, you cockblocked. BIG TIME.But I put up with it because I thought that I might be squirming my way to your heart...You remember...the thing that used to be where that big gapping black hole is?

Lesson Learned: Never settle for less than what you are demanding...And NEVER change what YOU do, when the other person refuses to change themselves.

My second mistake was putting blinders on. Yes, I went through your Facebook, when you left it up, yes I hacked you, yes I heard alllllllll kinds of stories from everyone and their mother about EXACTLY how many females you were messing with, but I kinda pushed it to the side, because to me, hear say, and implied evidence is not grounds to dismiss something that appeared to be going good.

Lesson Learned: Call a dude on WHATEVER it is that he has done to make me ask questions. I know that my "alarms" NEVER go off for no reason, and that being the case..I should listen to them. NEVER ignore the evidence that is right in front of you!

My third mistake was EVER feeling anything outside of friendship for you...All that love, loyalty and iish...BIG mistake...See, when you give, give, give something so precious as your time, love, and loyalty to someone who will NOT give it to you...You end up used up....empty

Lesson learned: Only give what you receive or know you WILL receive. No more, no less. Only give what you can afford to NOT get back..

I wouldn't EVER deny how much fun we had together...But at some point, fun just isn't enough...Late nights and fast food...Just won't cut it. And maybe I knew that. But I was always told things take TIME...You can't go from some random girl to wifey in a couple of weeks.

HOWEVER, That does NOT excuse you from being a 100% certified D-Bag. You are a user, manipulator, a whore (yes, that's what i tend to call men who get more than 2 girls pregnant at a time), a flexer...And You KNOW all of this...That makes you a sorry excuse for a man in my book. No matter how much success you achieve, you are still nothing to me if you are not a man of your word.

ANYWAY Doe! I wish you the best, and I SINCERELY hope you change your ways....Because ONE day, you'll meet someone who isn't as nice as me....

Friday, May 28, 2010

Relationships...What's inna name?

Between males and females in particular there is always a need for defining a relationship. "That's my home girl" He's my friend" "She's my girl on the side" "I'm wifey". But what happens if a title is not placed on the relationship? What if it remains undefined? Better yet, why is there a need for titles?

I've thought about it and I'm really undecided. If you meet a guy who treats you like a queen, but won't put the word girlfriend on your forehead, does that make you any less important to him? If you get phone calls from him only at two in the morning, but he says that you are his girlfriend does that mean he really cares about you more?

Say two people meet and enjoy each other a lot. They do the things that a couple would do, but even after a couple of months, a title has not been placed on the relationship.
Where do you go from there? More importantly if a title isn't placed on the relationship in question should it be ended? Do you risk putting strain on whatever it is you two have to ask the other person to make it official---- over a word? Noone wants to be strung around, but at the same time, you don't want to end up in a uncomfortable situation (i.e. he finds a girl whom he actually refers to as his girlfriend).

Is being hesitant to put a title on anything just another way to show that you don't wanna be committed? Can titles complicate things?
*edit* What could POSSIBLY be more complicated than the frustration of the two of you dating other people then getting mad about hearing about it? What could be more complicated than truly enjoying someone but basically just waiting for the other shoe to drop and them having to tell you that they have found someone that they want to "be" with. Would it really be more complicated than just saying you are boyfriend and girlfriend? Maybe being in a boyfriend /Girlfriend type relationship will change they way the couple operates which could definitely become a problem if they love how everything is now....Hmmmm

Now that I think about it, maybe titles and definitions don't mess up a relationship. Maybe people do. Maybe if there is communication about what is expected before anyone places a title, the fun that was had before hand can be maintained. And MAYBE the avoidance of a title is justa way to say that you don't want to be "tied down", or committed to that person. You may want that person, but you want a few others too, lol

Just some random stuff I have been thinking, That is all!